A Comprehensive and Complete List of Every Instance of Humans Transcending the Bounds of Mortality and Touching a Divine Presence

(I wrote the first six items on this list a week ago and have been desperately trying to think of items to expand it since; my imagination has run dry. I can only conclude that the list is therefore complete and cannot be added to.)

  1. The key change in “I Wanna Dance With Somebody.”
  2. The part in Return of the King where Eowyn pulls off her helmet and tosses her head a little bit so her hair comes over her shoulder and you’re like oh shit, it’s Eowyn! and then she’s like I AM NO MAN and you’re like oh shit that’s Eowyn
  3. Pretty much every way to cook a potato.
  4. That one dress Grace Kelly wears in To Catch a Thief.
  5. When the opening chords of “Don’t Go Breaking My Heart” come on the radio and every person in range instantly develops a telepathic bond with every other person to decide who’s going to sing DON’T GO BREAKING MY HEART and who’s going to sing I COULDN’T IF I TRIED.
  6. Scholastic book fairs.

That’s about it.


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